Gospel, the South, and the Spirit

Recently I've been having lots of thoughts about the South. I grew up in a Southern state, living there until I was 14. Since then I've rarely been back except for miserable summers and holidays with my parents who still live there. Christianity is a huge part of that Southern fear for me and is intimately related to my horrible experiences. It drives my parent's lives--providing a convenient excuse for my mother's depression and makes it impossible for them to see me as anything other than hellbound and in desperate need of salvation. I was born again a few times in my life--or at least that's how I experienced it.

So I haven't thought about the South as anywhere but a place to flee for years. Then I started working on this piece about growing up and went to Creating Change and had the chance to meet some folks from Southerners on New Ground (SONG). Recently I had the chance to hear The Blind Boys of Alabama perform. It reminded me of all the things about the South I do appreciate and what I found so moving in the work SONG is doing--I felt the spirit.

When I was a little kid I believed in the holy spirit. I actually used to pray to the street light outside my window because I though it was the Star of David and the holding place of God and spirit. I don't believe in that version of the spirit anymore, but I do believe in the need for a connection and for that emotional and communal moment of celebration and release and love. Gospel music, bluegrass music, classical, a really pretty day, great art, awesome activists and community, love--I've found it all these places, but it's been a long time since I let myself think about how Christian worship music used to do it for me.